I haven't felt this way in a long time. I don't know how to describe it... scared seems like the closest word, but it doesn't fit the situation exactly.
The best way I can sum it up is this: Earlier today, my ex's new boyfriend was getting up in my face, harassing me about this and that, threatening to "kick my ass" ect, ect. After a short while of not backing down he stands up and says something about decking me right here and now. Now, I've never been the type to just take something that I don't agree with, so I told him to come off it, and that he'd never do anything. This agitated him more, ect, ect, and he started getting angrier, until I got sick of it and just shoved him and walked away.
I shoved him? What is wrong with me? I have never, ever done anything like that in my life! This is what I'm scared of- What on earth kind of person am I becoming? Why am I letting the little things and the little people get under my skin like this? I should be a better person than this, I should be the one to take the high road, not the one resorting the lowest and least admirable of tactics! What has come over me?
*sigh* That's all. As you can tell, this is something that has really upset me. At risk of sounding whiny, I would really like someone to talk about this with.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Sorry Chris, I hadn't read this before. Hopefully you were able to talk to someone who cheered you up. You're no less yourself than you ever were. Emotions change, and these things are inevitable a lot of the time. Sometimes people wont listen, and the best thing to do is walk away. In your case, he was in the way. You did the right thing.
ReplyDelete